Joe Lavin

August 8, 2006

YouTube Fall Preview


Get ready for a new fall season on YouTube! Until now, only television networks have had fall seasons, but that's about to change. Coming to a computer near you this fall, it's a whole new YouTube! Sure, all your favorites are back, but we also have a brand new slate of exciting clips you can only catch on YouTube. We've got laughs! We've got drama! We've got hot music videos! We've even got thought-provoking clips! (Note: thought-provoking clips may not be available.)

More than anything, a new season at YouTube means one thing: more of Danny Bilger's ass. The rambunctious 19-year-old from Omaha is back for another season of full exposure. Look for new adventures at the Taco Bell drive-thru window, the Omaha Public Library, outside Becky Miller's parent's house, and even a few surprises along the way. You'll never guess where his ass will show up next! The reviews are in. Danny Bilger's ass is giant. A giant hit, that is!

Speaking of asses, George W. Bush returns for another season of goofs, gaffes, and mispronunciations! Every day, our President will do something embarrassing, and we'll have it for you immediately on YouTube. Whether it's a goofy face, rambling anecdotes about pigs during press conferences, or just plain inappropriate touching of foreign leaders, you can catch it all season on YouTube!

This October 15th, get ready for a new YouTube musical extravaganza when The Backstreet Boys join us to lip-synch all your favorite Chinese pop songs. Now that more people worldwide have seen those two Chinese kids lip-synch "I Want It That Way" then have actually seen The Backstreet Boys, this is the next logical step, and it's only on YouTube!

All this fall, we'll erroneously claim that your grandfather was a Nazi! Oh, sorry, that's Wikipedia, not us.

How about some rants? We've got more rants than ever this fall. First up, seven minutes from our friend's ex-girlfriend on how people who aren't vegan are no good in bed. Trust us. This one's a winner. That girl is crazy!

And don't forget the guy famous for screaming at his cat in one of last year's most popular clips. You know him. You love him. And he's back for a whole new season. Join him this year as he yells at his new dog, his neighbor's pet iguana, and even his mother-in-law. It's official. Among adults 18 to 49, Crazy Cat Screaming Guy was the most-watched nut yelling at an animal last year.

Here at YouTube, we also have some of the best that television has to offer. All this fall, you can catch the opening credits to "Charles in Charge," because that song rocks, and you know it!

If that's not enough, the most watched show on television is coming to YouTube as well. Thanks to TVPirateHero14's hacked Tivo, you can now catch "CSI" here every Thursday at ten, shortly after it airs on CBS. Be sure to get there quickly before it's taken down. Yes, it's appointment viewing on YouTube. (Special tip: If you have trouble, try searching for "Julia Child chicken recipe." Sometimes, he calls it that to thwart the copyright lawyers.)

This fall, we're also branching out with our first-ever mini-series. We’re very proud to announce that Russian Director Sergei Bondarchuk's 1968 version of "War and Peace" is coming to your computer. The classic 390-minute film will be broken down into 195 two-minute daily installments for your viewing pleasure. Don't miss it this fall, winter, and part of the spring at YouTube!

And finally: Who Wants to Pay for All Our Bandwidth? Join Regis Philbin in this exclusive YouTube game show event. Help us come up with a business plan -- any business plan -- to make YouTube a viable company, and you might just win yourself a brand new job!

Fall is almost here, and you can catch all the action on YouTube!


©2006 Joe Lavin

Joe Lavin's
Humor Column

http://joelavin.com

This Week's Column
Archives/Links
Bio
joe@joelavin.com

But I Digress...
Click here to buy my book!