Results tagged “Movies” from Joe Lavin's Humor Column

Suggestions for Remakes of Classic Films

The Seven-Year Itch - Richard Sherman is left in the city on his own, while his wife is away on a business trip. All is going well until an attractive young woman moves into the apartment above him. Will he be able to control his libido in the presence of this fetching young beauty? Of course, he will -- that is, until he accidentally mixes up his blood pressure medicine with his Viagra.

Performance Enhancement Hits Hollywood

As you get ready to watch the new Rambo movie, know this: John Rambo is juiced. Recently, Sylvester Stallone admitted using Human Growth Hormone (HGH) to get into shape for the role, and defends it by saying, "HGH is nothing."

I, for one, am appalled. Who knew there was HGH inside the actor's studio? It's just not right for actors to be taking any performance-enhancing drugs. Next thing you know, Stallone will win an Oscar for "Rambo," and we'll all know that the performance wasn't legitimate. After a movie, whenever you say, "What a performance," you'll catch yourself wondering whether the actor might have been on something. Well, something performance-enhancing, that is. 

The 20 Nights of Bond

What I Learned from the Ultimate James Bond Marathon

(A shorter version of this originally appeared in The Boston Globe)

As Daniel Craig prepares for his debut as the latest James Bond in "Casino Royale," here are a few tips from previous Bonds on how to live in the surreal world of 007.


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